This week has been a hard week for us here in the Wilson Household. We have been going through a lot of change and what feels like big decision making involving our lives. I know these decisions won’t be the last, but man, do they feel heavy.
It seems that often times the holidays do bring difficult decisions…whether it involve setting boundaries, difficult discussions with friends or family, decisions to be made for the new year…it seems this season for everyone tends to get a little bit more added stress than normal.
Today, I want to talk about how I have been navigating those difficult decisions, in hopes that it will help you too.
My first task is to always look at what my priorities are. These will always be different for every person, but what are your top most important things in your life. Maybe that is unclear for your or maybe you weren’t really looking at those priorities, but when you make a decision based off of your priorities in this season of life, you can never regret it. I think it is when we make decisions that AREN’T inline with our priorities that we really struggle.
Second, is to go with your gut. You will get a lot of mixed information given you will most likely have discussions with people about your struggles or maybe you will just feel indecisive, but when you really listen to your heart – it’s the decision you keep thinking is the right one – you will be doing exactly what you are meant to be doing.
Third, is a quote I heard which is “If you are looking for a sign that you are making the right decision, you already found one.” If you are looking for a sign, you looking for that sign is your indication in your choice.
Fourth, is to remember that we will make wrong decisions. I think allowing myself the grace to know that no matter what decision I make – if it doesn’t feel right, I can change it – really helps to provide me with peace. Can you go back to EXACTLY how things were before, probably not. But you can go back in some way or form and perhaps that is the exact direction or small shift you needed in the first place, but this was the only way to get there.
Lastly, is to remember that life is all about big decisions. You look at the cards laying in front of you and make the BEST DECISION you can make in this moment with the knowledge, support, and experience you have. This is life. We have made so many decisions in the past, just some feel heavier than others or some feel scarier than others and THAT IS OKAY.
Change can be a scary thing. It is unknown and uncomfortable. One of my sisters once told me, “The unknown monster is always scarier than the known.” For some reason, that line always gives me peace because just acknowledging that I am scared – scared to make the wrong decision, scared of the changes that may take place, scared of “messing up” – makes the decision all that much more tolerable. Many times, naming our emotions (something I am currently helping my two year old do), helps us to feel better about that emotion and take ownership of it.
I will leave you with this – if nothing else, just remember that growth can’t happen in the comfortable. It is within the uneasiness of big decisions, change, unknown, that we really get to know ourselves and learn. Sometimes the best way to find out what we like, care about, etc is through learning what we don’t like or making the wrong decision.
No matter your decisions that come this holiday season or throughout the year, just know that it will all be okay and I am proud of you. Making big decisions is hard, but you can do hard things.