It’s that time of year again where lights are hung all around the neighborhoods, Christmas trees are up, and you begin to feel like you can barely keep your head above water. Between getting ready for the holidays, normal life stuff, and cold weather, this time of year can seem difficult to manage. There is food everywhere, so you are eating horribly, its freezing cold, so heading to the gym sounds like a five day trip versus a 5 minute drive, and you have no clue how you are going to get it all done. I hear you, I feel you, and am here to help you.
I don’t know what it is about the holidays that makes life seem so much more difficult. I suppose it is because the holidays themselves bring along so many more tasks that when you have to do more than you are already asked to do (which is A LOT!), life begins to seem overwhelming. Instead of enjoying the holiday season like Hallmark movies tell you to, it may feel more like the Grinch has taken over your body and all you want to really do, is have it be over.
What I first want you to realize, is that you are not the only one who feels this way. Every women out there feels overwhelmed, doesn’t want to deal with having to clean up after the tree, and has no clue what to buy for their significant other who has everything. WE ALL FEEL IT. The question is how do we overcome it?
The other day, I provided some quick and easy tips on how to combat this a little bit, so if you haven’t seen that post yet, head on over to my Instagram. But what I really want to dive into today, is something that is more important than any of those things. It is something that we as women must remember year-round, but especially during this time of year: GIVING OURSELVES GRACE.
Once I learned that I wasn’t alone in the struggle of adulting and I could remind myself the importance of providing myself grace, I was able to tap into a whole new side to myself.
In nursing school, they tell you to take care of yourselves so you can take care of others. For example, if you haven’t eaten in eight hours, your mind probably isn’t very clear, which means you are much more likely to make a mistake than you would if you had some fuel in your body. This is very hard to do in nursing because patients think you are basically a robot and servant combined, but it is crucial to their safety. If you don’t take care of yourself, you are going to make a mistake, and that person needs you right now. The same goes for your life. If you don’t provide yourself with a little bit of grace and make yourself a priority, you are never going to be able to do the things asked of you…well…you might, but it is not going to be at a very good effort.
When we provide ourselves with grace, we take a layer of stress off of our shoulders and we realize that we don’t have to be perfect. It allows us the ability to finally open our eyes to the fact that we are doing our best and that is all that anyone can ask of us. It also makes us realize that we don’t have to do it all.
If we are going to get through this together, we have to accept that WE CAN’T DO IT ALL. Repeat that for me.
I CAN’T DO IT ALL.
Now that you have accepted this, you can move forward and recognize that some things are just going to be what they are. We work so hard and do so many things for so many people, yet we are constantly providing ourselves with negative self-talk and wondering why we can’t do more. What I have found is that when I am able to accept my hard work for what it is, I feel more positive in myself. When I feel more positive, I am able to accomplish more and provide more of myself to those I love.
Here is an example: When a baby is first learning to walk, think if parents decided that instead of holding their babies’ tiny hands up and encouraging them each step of the way, parents in turn told them, no, that’s not good enough. Or, maybe they decided to never buy them one of those walking popping lawn mowers (you know the one I’m talking about) because they didn’t care if they could do it or not. This, is essentially what you are doing to yourself. Instead, like parents do in cooing and filming their baby’s accomplishments and saying “You can do it” or Come on, it’s okay. Try again.” we tear ourselves down and say we can’t do it, it’s not okay, and don’t hold my hand.
Let’s reverse that. Let’s encourage ourselves, remind ourselves of all that we do and let’s give ourselves GRACE. It is okay, to fall down, it is okay to ask for help, and it is okay if it isn’t perfect. We are growing and as we grow, it is only going to get better. Some days are going to be good and some days are going to be insane and crazy this holiday season, but if we remember to give ourselves grace, we can begin to enjoy the holidays for all that they are and we can begin to strengthen our confidence as women.
This season is stressful. Sometimes if just feels like we are barely getting by. But, next week, instead of being stressed about all that you have to do. Remind yourself to be gracious, eat pizza for dinner, and enjoy the Holiday. A few days here and there of bad eating, isn’t going to kill you because you are sharing meals with family. A dirty house covered with pine needles doesn’t matter because instead your house smells like a tree, there are pretty twinkle lights up, and you get to show how much you love the people in your life by buying them a special something.
Take a deep breath, turn your thinking around, and remember it is all going to be okay. You are beautiful, smart, kind, and GOOD person. You are an amazing woman that has the ability to work, take care of a household, take care of kids, cook, clean, workout, try and eat well, look cute, be the best wife or girlfriend, be the best friend or daughter, etc. all while having a smile on your face.
We are superwomen. Ssssshhhh. Don’t tell the men.